as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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