I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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