she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
And my parents said I crawled through the house
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
