If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
