I need help removing her.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Randomize
