I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
