I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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