they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
She even gives head with a lisp.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
