Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
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