Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
of course. lets lasso hookers.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
