What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
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