We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
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