I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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