I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
