i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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