I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
