He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Randomize
