Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
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