just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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