He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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