Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize
