Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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