To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
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