dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
