i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
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