if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
