We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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