Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
