I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
