Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize