singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
