bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
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