It's just like the Real World with babies
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
