Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Randomize
