People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
