bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
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