we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
