The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize
