Is it normal to miss your booty call?
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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