Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
How's work?
Spinning.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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