How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
