How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
