Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize