your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
