he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
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