mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
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