Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
