do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
party gras won. party gras always wins.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
