he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
