Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
